Displaced Violence

I WANT TO BREAK PLATES, LIKE HOW YOU BROKE MY HEART,

chiseling small cracks then dropping it all at once.

I WANT TO PUNCH WALLS ‘TIL IT GOES COMPLETELY RED,

as red as those lips which spoke nothing but lies.

I WANT TO INFILTRATE A NEIGHBORING HOUSE, LIKE HOW YOU ENTERED MY LIFE,

unexpected, unwanted, yet forced into submission.

I WANT TO BURN DOWN A LIBRARY, KNOWING THAT BOOKS ARE MY LIFE,

just so you’d have an idea of how much i’m killing myself right now.

I JUST WANT TO SELF DESTRUCT THIS VERY SECOND,

because this is all too much for me.

I WANT TO SEE THINGS BROKEN.

I WANT TO LOOK AT THEM SHUFFLED IN CHAOS.

because I can’t see how broken I am.

I can only feel it,

And feel it all at once.

On the Wrong Side of the Bed

i wake up to the same thing
something that i don’t know
i wake up to it and i don’t feel anything
but i also feel everything
is it something that i had?
or i think i had?
or i had for a while
but i can’t have now
and is it a person
a desire
a sensation
is it something that hurt me? yes
but i’m still looking for it\
even when i don’t know what i’m looking for.
opposite to that.
is it something i fear?
A situation i am now in.
like waking up to a house, alone.
or being told that you’re worthless
that you’re a second choice
or that it was all for play
or revenge
these things from the past
i’ve boxed them up
i’ve set them aside
but somehow, they’ve managed to come out
and haunt me, and hunt me down.